What if

Have you ever wondered what will you do 20 years down the road? Which friends will still be with you then?

Okay, not so far fetched, what about 10 years down the road? What is your future route gonna be like?

Or even closer, what will you do after your Alvls?

Have you ever wondered? I did though, and i fear at the sight of it. Mayb it is cos i hate the feelings of deciding and planning your future route in life where no one will provide for you. In schools, the system is built in a way that you will naturally get educated and make friends and ...
But after JC life, i cant imagine how am i going to be so independent. Or rather will i still have the friends i am having now? Or will i be mixing with another whole new bunch of people? How will my working life be like? How is it that i am going to survive on myself when i am old enough to live alone? So many questions. No answers

Seems like what i read two days ago really makes sense in Dailybread. Often, we are anxious and scared of what our future will be. And this is inevitable and luckily normal. But personally, knowing god's there and before me. the head and nt the tail is comforting. I need faith and trust him. I need.

Random thought: How does chicken lay eggs everyday when it is enclosed in a cage by itself? How to mate? LOL

2nd Random thought: Why is a goft competition cancelled but not a soccer match? Don't lightning strike everywhere, be it in a goft course or soccer field?

Hmmmm, i wish someone can be there whenever i have smth to talk abt.

That someone is still someone. Some friends are there for you but i find it hard to talk to them at times. I can't be my normal self except with someone. Secret! haha. But that someone is a fren of course. Don think too much haha

Words beyond expln... donno how to describe haha. Things seem different when they all seem to be alright.

Cant wait for As.! I study till my eyes turn red. And is a horizontal red line across both eyes. Am i going mad?? hahaha..

Days at home are good but they can be boring at times when you are alone. Thats when u do silly things!

Struck off the happy day. Lazy haha. I know can already. Anyway, Ytd was dumb of me! haha


FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1st time so malu!

Sometimes, blog seems to be meaningless imo. A diary seems to be more appropriate. More personal. More sentimental. Haha, mayb i shld change to a diary.

Realize lots of things in the context of studies nd to be caught up.

I study slower than others, but i don deny nth is impossible to overcome :)

Wheres she when u wanted her most? Life is so confusing. When u wan smth, it doesnt comes to u, vice versa....

haha.

Hope dad and mum are having fun out there in Aus, while i control myself and bury myself in books.

God bless my family in every ways:) and shalom,isaac,ccm. So is my frens, relatives.

Practically everyone,but primarily my family haha.

Cya
Ziyan

Happy Day 4th: NS on jan 11!!! :(

Title speaks it all. Yet on a good note, i am going to enjoy more after i book out :)

Happy day 3!

Thankful for all teachers, esp mrs tan and mrs lim.

W/o them, i donno what will happen to my character and my studies. Thank god for them. Pray that god will bless them in return :)

Mrs tan is the best teacher and one who is really like a fren to me :) If u r reading, i am really thankful for what u've done and i wish u all the best for the upcoming years in ur life. god bless u!

Mrs lim is a very experienced teacher who passes her knowledge of chemistry extremely well. Cant believe how i have improved. From U all the way to S in block test, mye to D in prelim and to A in Alvl in future :)

And i almost have the worst nightmare today! Guess those in the class know haha. Worst of the worst. Scary man. hahaha. and Embarrased to the max. Thank you WJ AND HL for everything today :) Ur pro activeness saves me :) I thank you guys really if u r reading this=) Thanks man!!!

Anyway, L4D ppl if u r reading the post 08s107 guys. I promise i will play someday! I wan class bonding, i wan these ppl to last forever in friendship in my life :) Even though we may not clique at times, loving ppl goes beyond that :)

Hopefully one last thing, donno if this will ever come true, i just hope i have a chance to know that person better :) hahaha someone someone someone

Cya
Ziyan

Happy Day 2!

I am great and happy of what my teachers said for the past few days :)
' Ziyan, u got the potential to get an A'
' Ziyan, u can pass but i know you can do better than that. I know u have worked very hard'

These sentences really impact me and i am believing more than ever than nothing is impossible. Even if all else fails, nothing can fail you if you don give up believing and DOING of course right! haha

I know this is great and i cannot be complacent. I got to start working harder harder every day. Yet, 8 hours of sleep is compulsory for me to stop falling asleep while studying. That is very bad, very bad. Got to get up and stop sleeping! motivation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! energy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

U may think i am mad. Perhaps i am. But i am mad for getting good results for the better of the world and I :)

Cya
Ziyan

1st Day

Decided to run with a so called day numbering in my blog from now on- inspired by chang zai xin! haha. ok lame. 1st Day of living a fulfiling life starts today i suppose :)

1 month left! Ppl have yet to cope mentally with their prelim papers when now we are back to round one- fighting the battle. In school now, many people ard me seem to be nervously on the inside imo, i donno mayb cos is one month only or the fear of losing out in the competitve educatn system?

1 month seems long yet when u plan and do, it seems freaking impossible to finish. Talking abt all these studies, it is so frustrating. I cannot believe here i am studying like hell just or worse than O's. I still rmb during olvl, i say to myself aft O's, i will not never work so hard- it is just so tormenting. Freak!

Had some bad days nowadays with people with myself. Esp during studies. When u are in something crucial, u tend to avoid it u know what i mean? This is pathetic haha. Temptns, negative thoughts keep coming. But i gonna persevere! No man is too weak to overcome anything. Shall focus on my study plan, and perform better than Alvl! :)

All As, i am excited, confident but not complacent! haha.

It is all abt how we look at life that determines half e outcome. studies, work, career.

Sometimes, on the contrary, i will ponder why is our life so sophiscated? I rather choose e old ages type of life :) Even if we are outdated, we enjoy life to our liking.

Cya
Ziyan

Gotta stop my bad habits!

Gotta stop daoing people, esp ppl whom i know in the past
Gotta stop being selective in socialising, thats really bad....
Gotta stop being indecisive!
Gotta stop being lazy!
Gotta stop playing!
Gotta stop procrastinating
Gotta stop having a plan yet not fulfiled
Gotta stop being a hypocrite sometimes.

So many gotta stops... but most impt is still the first one. gotta stop being loving at times only and to certain ppl only. Thats bad when it comes to living a fulfiling life imo. I hate it and i shld overcome this weird fear in me....

Dota this weekends, and i am gone!

Cya
Ziyan

Thankful for all days and excited for the upcoming exams to come! This is really quite cool becoz for prelim, i was excited too and not nervous for the exams. I really was confident but not complacent to get the targets i had intended w/o doubt. Though i did not in the end, i am still excited cos i know god is going to bless me in the end. All As is not a far sighted goal. I can see it already in spite of no As for now. haha. Nothing is too far, nothing is too hard. Only fear impedes all that.

Once i get rid of fear, and take control of my circumstances, i am just so excited for all the exams to come.

Nevertheless, hard work has to be doubled and faith has to be tripled :)

Cya
Ziyan